Women are amazing creatures. I am not just saying that because I am one, But I really believe that a woman is a fierce thing to behold. Women can convey a message without using words and can light up a room at the drop of a hat. What is it that women these days find beautiful you might ask? Well, it has been an honor and a privilege to ask this question, and a few others, to the women I see every day.... my co workers and very dear friends and family. So sit back and read what I have discovered is true for all women: beauty is timeless. It isn't just about outer beauty and inner peace, but it's about what shapes us as young ladies that helps us weed through all the garbage society can throw our direction. As the old saying goes, "beauty is as beauty does."
Here are the questions asked:
1. Define beauty
2. At what age did you, or do you, feel the most beautiful?
3. What do you do for yourself, regularly, that makes you feel beautiful?
4. Who is a beautifully influential person you can think of?
5. How much of what you understand about beauty, came from your mom?
6. Give me your best skin care advice.
In the quest to find some answers to these questions, I began by asking some of the women I come into contact with every day.... my co workers. A little background information on me: I work at a wonderful nursing home in Stanwood, Washington and 95% of the nursing staff is female. What better than to start here??
Let's meet Denise. She is a 50-something year old, just recently re-married woman that has worked in nursing for over 24 years. She loves Ebay and Harley Davidson, coffee and a great pair of shoes. Denise couldn't exactly answer the 'define beauty' question, but when I asked her who a beautifully influential person was she said it was her mom. It was her mother's sense of style that stuck with Denise as a young girl and to this day, I can always look to Denise for a very well put together outfit. She just doesn't miss a beat, thanks Denise's mom!
Then there was Alyssa, age 26. She is my best friend, the funnest person to be around and very selfless. Alyssa is the activities director at Warm Beach, a mother of a 15 month old boy and has been happily married for 5 years to her high school sweetheart. She defines beauty as CONFIDENCE. When I asked her the 'at what age' question, she said, "I'm hoping it gets better with age. I look back at pics of high school, my youthful appearance and see how insecure I was back then. Now I am more secure but find more flaws as I age. Funny how THAT works." Interestingly enough, she chose a movie star as her beautifully influential person; Kate Winslet. She admires Kate's fresh face, ability to play with make up and fashion without being extreme while still maintaining her regality. Alyssa learned quite a bit from her mom about beauty; how to blend the foundation line at a woman's jaw line, basic up keep of the brows and how to apply her daily make up.
Then there is the boss, Mrs.Laura, age unknown :) She is an RN and the Director of Nursing Service at Warm Beach. She is a mother of 2, grandmother of 1, has been married for 20-ish years and is a devout Catholic. In fact, when I asked her what she does on a regular basis to make herself feel beautiful, her answer was go to church every Sunday. Laura defines beauty as an aura and felt the most beautiful when she was pregnant with her children. Although she doesn't give credit to her mom for teaching her anything about beauty, Laura believes that her mom is the most beautifully influential person she knows. Her mom single handedly raised five kids all by herself. Laura's best skin care advice - "use the scrubies on your face"...... which really means, exfoliate.
Tammy, age 40 something. She has been a beautician for at least 20 years, loves diet coke and a great deep red lip stick. Oh, and she is one of my Aunties :) Auntie Tammy also works at Warm Beach as the in house hair stylist and has 2 kids with Uncle Dennis. When I asked her the 'at what age' question, she said it was in her early 30's - because she felt like she "was old enough for people to take me seriously, without being too old." She said that she puts make up on EVERY DAY to make herself feel beautiful and said that her best pick me up is red lip stick and a pair of earrings. She doesn't credit her mother with hardly anything in what she understands about beauty and stated that her younger sister, Sherry (my mom) is her most beautifully influential person because "she is who she means to be."
Then I began asking some of the "regulars" that come into the beauty shop. These were some of the funniest interviews I had all week.
Virginia, age 86. She says that beauty is a straight nose and inner peace. She also stated that she didn't learn anything from her mother in the realm of physical beauty because, Virginia says, she looks more like her father.... Virginia is a retired RN and said she felt the most beautiful at 19, when she got married. She credits her weekly hair appointment as the thing that regularly makes her feel beautiful and said that I was her beautifully influential person because I was "spunky."
Irmgard, age 83. "Beauty is showing kindness to others, coming from within the heart," was Irmgards answer to the define beauty question. The thing I loved about Irmgard's answers was that she didn't think too hard about it. Her regular beauty feel good, is to eat out. How great is she?! She said she felt the most beautiful when she was in her 50's because she was the happiest in this decade. Irmgard's beautifully influential person was actually her two best friends Marie and Maxine. They sit together at church every Sunday :)
Bracie, age 80 something. Bracie is my southern belle. She defines beauty as personality and a sweet smile. Bracie felt the most beautiful when she was 52. She had just recently become widowed and when she met her 2nd husband, he made her feel feel more mature. She says this is the age she "came into" herself. Bracie has 6 sisters and growing up she had to learn her beauty regiment on her own, but credits her sisters with helping her learn how to put on her make up and put together a glamorous outfit. Her most beautifully influential person was her niece Gretchen. Unfortunately, Gretchen was killed at a young age but Bracie remembers her dark hair and blue eyes. "She was too beautiful to stay in this world," is how Bracie recalls her niece.
And finally, here are the answers to the leading ladies in my life.... my sisters and my mother.
Sophie, oldest sister, age 26. Happily married, mother of one and an interior designer. Her definition of beauty is found in Proverbs 31:10-31; What a woman in Christ looks and how she conducts herself. She also credits our mother for the understanding of beauty she has acquired over the years. In her youth, Sophie saw our mother as a strong provider and now in Sophie's quest through motherhood, she credits our mom with the ability to lead by example in all things Christ breathed. Sophie felt the most beautiful on August 30th , 2009; the day she was married to Grant. Let's keep it in the family; her most beautifully influential person is our Auntie Tammy. "It's her genuine femininity and natural beauty that makes her gorgeous to me. Well that, AND she gives me free haircuts." Best skin care advice: wash your face every night, no matter how tired you are.
Jessica (Yessica), youngest sister, age 19. She is currently a beauty student at Gary Manuel/Aveda in Seattle. When I asked her what she does for herself regularly, Jessica answered, "wash my hair." She defines beauty as confidence and felt the most beautiful at 17 because it was at that age that she began experimenting with make up, clothes and putting outfits together. Jessica also says that her mom has had a great impact on what she has come to understand of beauty. She thinks that her mom is a wonderful example of strength, poise and genuine selflessness. Best skin care advice: don't fuss over your face. Less is always more.
Sherry, age 40 something, my mother. Sherry is a mother of 7, grandmother of 3 and happily married to her husband Mike. She defines beauty as, "knowing who you are in Christ," and with that you can clearly see why she is the best mom ever.... Ok, so here is the rest of her answers. When I asked her how much she credits her mother for her understanding of beauty, she said barely anything. The only thing she could think of is eyebrows. As a child my mom would look at my grandma while she was sleeping and think, "Man, why does my mom look so beautiful when she is sleeping??" It was the brows! Ever since then, my mom has been very precise about the shape and thickness of her brows. When I asked her what she does to feel beautiful, regularly, she said that she reads Gods word. Age she felt the most beautiful: 21, because people told her she was. Best skin care advice: wash and moisturize your face daily.
After talking to these very lovely ladies, my conclusion is this: There may be a large group of women today that believe beauty is only what society perceives in a person, but the rest of us could care less. I titled this blog post "A Smile Makes All the Difference," because that's where I think beauty can be found in any woman. It is the great equalizer, the common denominator that every woman has and has differently. A smile is like a snowflake; no two smiles are the same. The most interesting thing I have discovered is the generational differences between girls and their mothers throughout the last 50 years. 50 years ago, mother's weren't teaching their daughters how to wear make up or how to put together an outfit. I think that for mothers 50 years ago, the idea that their daughters could be interested in material things wasn't prominent. Its almost as if young girls 50 years ago were still behaving like young girls ought to; playing outside with their dolls and best friends. As I began to ask ladies that were younger than 30, the answers became more about their moms leading by example that left more of an imprint on them for what beauty is. They didn't need tutorials on make up application because they were getting that from society. What they were most attentive to was how their mother was not only brave, but how she was able to maintain her physical beauty on top of being a fierce force in the world around them. Man how the times have changed!
My answers you might ask? Here ya go.
Beauty is..... confidence in who you are.
I felt the most beautiful at age 23 and a half... so right now. I can't say for sure that this is as good as it gets, but I am becoming confident in two things: who I am in Christ and how I present myself to the world.
I regularly practice applying make up to my face in many different looks. I study the application process so I can experiment with different colors and then help others understand the looks they are going for.
A beautifully influential person is...... DUH. My mother! In my late teens I couldn't stand her accountability, and now I depend on it. She is my true north (other than Christ) and her love never fails me. Believe me, I have put her through the ringer quite a few times!
I credit my mother 85% of what I understand about beauty. The other 15% I credit the other ladies in my family; my sisters, my aunts and most importantly my grandmothers.
My best skin care advice: Cleanse, exfoliate, tone and moisturize. In that order daily, if not weekly.
Long blog, I know!! This one has been building for a solid week. Hope you enjoyed it!
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